This was supposed to be my column for today.
Barangay Bansot’s Silent Majority
KAPITAN Calabasa was late, and so, he missed most of the fun. But he got to hear Madam’s thank you remarks.
“Thank you, Eminensh, Your Exshelenshiesh. Thank you fathersh and shishtersh. Here are your love offeringsh, let ush continue to do the Good Lordsh, I mean, my hushband’s, my childrensh, and my, work. We are the Holy Family. God put ush here.
“Thank you, congreshmen. Thank you, governorsh. Thank you, mayorsh. Thank you, kagawadsh. Here ish your fork barrel flush an attendanshe bonush, and yesh, your frojektsh are shafe.
“Thank you, columnishtsh, for your dedicashion to our truth: don’t worry, your hushband will remain in charge of our penshionsh, and you, your board sheat in our bank ish shafe. Oh, and ash for you, shorry, no more readersh shince you moved to our crony fafer but I appreshiate your effortsh anyway, but shtof throwing water in feofle’s fashes, ha? To all of you othersh, fretending to be objective, your veshted intereshts are one with mine!
“Thank you clashmatesh, I don’t regret giving you jobsh in my adminishtrashion.
“Thank you generalsh, thank you bushineshmen, we will all froshfer together. I shay to all of you… We will not be dishtracted by the folitical noishe!”
When everyone was through falling to the floor to demonstrate awe and delight, the hard-working Madam tackled other business.
“And now, we need to work on our meshaging. Shecretary Fabili?”
“Dukutin ang pang matrikula, ituloy ang aming ligaya!”
“I don’t like. Too honesht. Shecretary Calburo?”
“Sa laki ng matrikula, turo ninyo pamumulitika!”
“Good. Plashter along the shcoolsh that hate me. Shec. Madaya, you can charge it to the nutrishion frogram. Nexsht?”
“Itrabaho natin ang panggugulo!”
“No. Shec. Hormiga?”
“Trabaho hindi gulo!”
“Good (give my regardsh to Mala Bihon). Theshe will be the shlogansh of Kashabwit sha Kalokohan. Charge their adsh to the Dishinformashion Agenshy. Nexsht?”
“Patabain natin ang mga pulitiko!”
“Hay nacu. Shec. Nalito? Imfrove, pleashe?”
“Pagkain hindi politika!”
“Clever. Slogansh for Kongresho ng Mambububulong Filipino. Charge the adsh to Metro Gago. Nexsht?”
“Ikuryente ang media, lokohin natin para sa presidente!”
“Too blunt. Shec. Bungi?”
“Ibaba ang kuryente, hindi ang presidente!”
“Good. Slogansh for Fartylisht Kakuntshaba. Charge to Frovidentshal Bashtushang Fambanshang Liaishon Offishe. Nexsht. Our latesht innovashionsh in fromoting the Rule of Lawleshnesh? Shec. Shiraulo?”
“Madam, since we are fighting the Truth, we decided that even if we have to sacrifice Executive Ordure 464 and Mambobola Circular 108, we simply issue new rules accomplishing the same thing.”
“Ish Monkey Gotme drafting them?”
“Yes Madam!”
“Your Eminenshe? Queshtion?”
“Aren’t we insulting the intelligence of our flock in Barangay Bansot?”
“Wait, my shon will anshwer that.”
“You ha. Wait ha. We’re not bastos, ha. Shut up ha? I don’t care what you say, ha? You’re giving daddypoo high blood pressure, ha. Just obey-obey us! We give you na nga eh why are you so demanding pa, ha?”
“But the desert, our sea, the Israelites…”
“Ah. Desshert? Meaty Forflavor will get for you, Eminenshe. Chocolate or vanilla? Anyway. Yesh, Mr. Juramentado?”
“Santa Palanggana! Madam, there are destabilizers from… from… all your alma maters! In Putakti City! Evil, awful… what do you call them, oh, students!”
“We are shafe here in Campo Carne. Yesh, Mareng Meanie? Thank you, by the way, for shuforting me, but (he-he) get real. My darling hushband ish staying.”
“Oh. But. Madam, the young people, their requests?”
” I hereby decree, a No Hover Zshone in Futakti Shity. Becaushe if you don’t shee them, they don’t exshisht. Shimfle! Yesh, Father Imbyernash?”
“But… reform… strengthening… institutions? Help?”
“Tell them to take it uf with my shonsh. They are the youth, too. They are the pillarsh of the inshtitushionsh we’re building.”
“Mommy, only if they’re pretty, ha? I don’t like talking to the pangit-pangit, ha? Or the brainy ones, ha? They can make a date with me in my restaurant, plenty-plenty food there.”
“OK you heard him. Go away. Yesh, Mishish Faidroshash?”
“I bloody support you, eh wot!”
“Cheaf, you shound like your daughter. But I already shaid, thank you columnishtsh.”
“But Madam…”
“Yesh, Shfeaker Jar-Jar?”
“Waza boutda peepol? They issa hates youse!”
“Sho? We have the Shilent Majority shuforting ush! The besht! They don’t need to be bribed, they don’t vote, becaushe they don’t exisht! Ferfect! More for all of ush! Anymore queshtionsh? None? Dishmished!”
***
WAHAHAHA this is hilarious Sir Manolo AYUZ!
I dont know , pero iba ang impression ko sa column. But Im sure this is intedended to entertatin your rabid anti Gloria fans. Indeed, they badly needed some entertainment these days.
Heheh Manolo, I like this one….
and also this
With a few tweaks this story has a lot of possibilities, wish I was a cartoonist 😀
No, this piece of Manolo can not outdo the entertainment we have been getting from the unelected president. Examples:
1. She was the first to refer to herself as the evil one. Before Jose Rizal’s grave, she remarked that “in this country, she was the cause of division” – only diabolus-the diabolical one is the cause of division!
2. She claimed that she will not run – and SHE DID!
3. She was sorry she talked to Garci – but not sorry to direct him to alter and the generals to influence the votes in her favor
4. She issued eo366 to streamline bureaucracy in 2003, happily , she has emaciated the agencies and bastardized the same with her predilection to extend favors to incompetent political appointees
The litany from the one with a permanent lisp, permanent scowl and very poor command of the Filipino language is more than just entertaining.
We do not have to fight over the numbers that attended the Makati rally, by the way, the physical count of bodies there is high enough. There are many venues now for protest movements-one is cyberspace.
I dont know , pero iba ang impression ko sa column. But Im sure this is intedended to entertatin your rabid anti Gloria fans. Indeed, they badly needed some entertainment these days- rego
hahaha. bato-bato sa langit matamaan huwag magalit! pikon!
YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!! 🙂
Bwahahahahaha!!! Brilliant, Manolo. But wait – where’s the pea soup? Still in her gullet… 🙂
let everyone call them every possible name – including apathetic, sleeping – but one thing still remains – they are the majority.
they are deciding with their silence
hey, they gave nixon his victory.
Hahahahaha! This is hilarious. I wanted to see articles like these last year pa. There are some sectors saying that Gloria will definitely not resign and worst, she will stay beyond 2010. Of course, I saw this coming the time Rev. Quiboloy proclaimed her as “God’s chosen one” as in God literally talked to him, Gloria was beside him saying “praise God, uhummm, praise God, uhummmm.” The video is on you tube…
If this happens what will the naysayers say, sorry, our mistake – ayusin nyo na lang dyan, nandyan lang din naman kayo?
let everyone call them every possible name – including apathetic, sleeping – but one thing still remains – they are the majority.
— Anthony Scalla
Majority? How did you know that? I suppose those who want to think than they belong to the majority must only speak for himself or herself. It doesn’t help if we would resort to twisting facts about what constitutes the “majority”.
The majority that GMA wants so desperately spin to the public is being done by assembling congressmen, governors, and other local officials. We don’t even know that these local officials who in fact go to Malacanang are really supporting her. She extrapolates that since she has the leaders, ergo she has the constituents. One thing is clear she is desperate to preserve a semblance of support from the public.
let everyone call them every possible name – including apathetic, sleeping – but one thing still remains – they are the majority.
they are deciding with their silence-a.scalia
what majority? maybe suffering in silence cause YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!
what with the pro-gmas? even in their names they try to project that they are better than the rest of us here?
you good friend with clarence thomas? 🙁
The Tabako is namamangka na naman sa dalawang ilog.
“You must not jump to any conclusions just because it was seemingly well-attended. There was a lot of energy but if you’re looking at previous people power events that were successful, resulting in regime change, I think we are just beginning.†— FVR on the Feb 29 rally
Nakiki-“we”.
“The majority that GMA wants so desperately spin to the public is being done by assembling congressmen, governors, and other local officials. We don’t even know that these local officials who in fact go to Malacanang are really supporting her. She extrapolates that since she has the leaders, ergo she has the constituents. One thing is clear she is desperate to preserve a semblance of support from the public.” – Madonna
Same findings on my end. The budget for “infrastructure” projects is really a profitable one for the local government officials who are “in the loop” hence even our governors, mayors from Mindanao will fly to Manila at a moments notice to show support. Actually, if these naysayers are as mobile as they sound, they can visit Mactan right now and look at the very expensive lamposts used for the ASEAN summit or something…even the tricycle drivers have a nasty comment – too bad they are part of the “silent majority” because they can’t afford to leave work even for 1 day, magugutom pamilya nila. The so called “silent majority” is not intentionally silent, they have not been given a voice thats all…I wonder why???
Oops, Manolo my comment is awaiting moderation again, and its moderate, honest.
There is a big difference between a toothache and metastatic cancer. The people know the Truth is we have a social cancer. Their reaction to that knowledge, is what some mistakenly call “people power fatigue”. The people know the psychic dentistry of people power doesn’t work. They have a better appreciation of Rizal’s diagnosis than the Edsa Dos Diehards, who are still clueless about what really happened there, and can’t understand why the people refuse to rush to the dentist’s chair.
“Itrabaho natin ang panggugulo!â€Â
“No. Shec. Hormiga?â€Â
“Trabaho hindi gulo!â€Â
Perfect. Sino kaya talaga ang nanggugulo? Anyone who’s seen the posters along EDSA (and even at the QC Circle) should feel agitated.
istambay_sakalye
here’s one truth you can’t handle – NAKAUPO PA RIN SI GLORIA!
kaya okay lang – laugh all you want, name-call all you want, continue what-you-want
kasi nakaupo pa rin si gloria
DJB,
I’m looking at “people power” as a wake up call to everyone, if its loud enough, it will lead to attention, then to awareness, then “empowerment.” then we will to to the dentist – sometimes we need to feel some pain before we actually do that, regular visits for profilaxis etc., is not a common practice for the ordinary pinoy, unless its part of the medical/dental package in employment…
Kung nakaupo pa rin si Gloria afer 2010, dyan tayo magkaproblema. Yung mga supporters niya kuno (in this blog) na hanggang sa blog lang – they will disappear I’m pretty sure of that. Rather than taking responsibility for their actions they’ll extricate themselves safely. What so you expect, they are not even taking action for their convictions? Thats the beauty of anonymity…
DJB Realist
I agree with you. A lot of people are not saying we should really get to the truth of the matter first. People Power is not working. Two Leaders have been taken out and see where it got the country…NOWHERE!
ramrod
if it’s a wake up call for the government to actually start discussion on what really happened to the different so called scandals…then I support your efforts. If it’s just to remove somebody and replace them with another set of monkeys dressed as politicians…then count me out
silent waters,
I beg to disagree with “nowhere” speak for yourself. There is a substantial number of us who benefited from leadership changes. We have a leadership crises, the solution – change in leadership, we deserve better. If you think mediocrity is okay or even below standard – don’t believe it applies to everybody…
Madonna,
five words – nakaupo pa rin si gloria
kaya just continue saying anything and everything, kasi when all is said and done – nakaupo pa rin si gloria
di ba may kasabihan sa English – “the proof of the pudding is in the eating”? nakaupo pa rin si gloria. where’s your ‘majority’?
ano? malapit na? abangan! (if it will come at all)
one unsolicited advice – ban all politicians, including Erap, Tita Cory, and Lozada, from all rallies. baka that might convince your ‘majority’ to come out in full force
(take note – ang pinag-uusapan natin ay ang majority na ayaw ng people power, at hindi ang majority na ayaw kay gloria. maraming may ayaw kay gloria na ayaw din mag people power, na willing to wait till 2010)
silent waters, my only question: where is the pressure coming from, that’s been forcing the government to relent, and which has led the supreme court to intervene, despite its every effort not to do so?
the danger of “truth” is of course that may not even be what those demanding that it emerge, wanted. but when blocked with every possible obstacle it is reasonable to start thinking that what that “truth” is not complimentary, to say the least, to those conspiring to hold it back.
which brings us to the authorities fiercely wanting nothing at all to emerge, period.
reflect on this passage from here:
http://willshakespeare.wordpress.com/2008/02/29/inertia-sustaining-the-edsa-movement/
silent waters,
Yes. Remove EO 464. Let potential witnesses out of detention. Let everyone who wishes to speak out speak out. Let the “Jonas Burgoses” out, if there is nothing to hide, lets shed some light on all these issues. Once and for all lets get some closure on “hello garci”, jokjok bolante fertizer issue, etc.
I’m not for a “bastille” like change myself, and one of my fears honestly is that some influential politician hovering like a vulture will just swoop in and take advantage of the confusion (if there is one).
There is something that needs to be done, so lets do it, we can’t afford to be “teka-teka” we only need to have confidence in ourselves that this time we’ll do it right – but lets do it…
here’s one truth you can’t handle – NAKAUPO PA RIN SI GLORIA!- a.scalia
at edge of the chair! she will be sitting in jail for a very very long time soon! itaga mo sa bato! YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!
anthony scalia,
Its a process, its hard work, sometimes its frustrating, but its getting there and I’m just glad some people are willing to stick it out…and I respect such people…With regards to old faces in the crowd, hey, past is past, we have to reconcile our differences, some have already paid for their transgressions, its time to sincerely forgive each other and join together to achieve a common goal. Gloria could have been part of it had she fullfilled her task as “transition” leader, but she chose to hang on to power. Its that “addictive?”
then howl all you want…AWOOOOOOOOO! Nation building at its finest, eh?
name-call all you want, continue what-you-want–a.scalia
nothing wrong with pointing out the obvious.right? don’t be onion skinned. there’s no crying here too!
YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!!!
jepo, yes, it is. our country was imagined by a real howler. read the noli and the fili. makes my barangay bansot stories look tame and kind.
ramrod,
“Kung nakaupo pa rin si Gloria afer 2010, dyan tayo magkaproblema.”
agreed. pero speculation lang yan
“Rather than taking responsibility for their actions they’ll extricate themselves safely. What so you expect, they are not even taking action for their convictions? Thats the beauty of anonymity”
para namang di ka rin shadowed by anonymity…
the members of the kick-gloria-now school – how do they take action for their convictions? barking ‘patalsikin na now na’ ad nauseam? attending rallies? yun lang? realized convictions na yun?!?
job creation is much more important that kicking out gloria before 2010. in my modest way, i try to help create jobs. kahit konti. if everybody does his share, the ‘less’ add up
tutal, jobs naman talaga ang what matters.
yung pagsipa kay gloria before 2010, wala namang macre-create na jobs yan. magkakaroon pa ng collateral damage sa economy.
pero okay lang if the kick-glora-now school can put safety nets to cushion the collateral damage. but what can be expected from people who consider barking ‘patslsikin na now na’ ad nauseam and attending rallies as the best they could do for the country?!
jepo,
Its HURAH!!!
istambay di naman kelangang mag *all caps*.
Anthony,
Who says I don’t see that nakaupo pa rin si Gloria. Why belabor the point?
I agree, re: politicians prominence. Lozada? He is being invited by students all the time.
All right. Re: majority, thanks for the clarifcation. See we must be careful about “facts”.
Re: people power. Consider for a minute. People power is not just confined to rallies or loud demos. This is 2008 and there are other avenues for people power.
the blog is drifting to name-calling
DJB,
I agree we have a social cancer which has not been cured despite the previous people power revolutions. If we are going to indict GMA, the system that bred her must be indicted as well — and I think that’s what most people who are not so loud in condemning her, want. What’s great is that there are opportunities for having a full radiation blast to cure this cancer, by taking the issue further and deeper to all Filipinos.
GMA is very smart because she employs divisive tactics all the time and would like people to think that it is for the long term advantage of the public if we let her finish her term 2010. However, her track record speaks for itself, she cannot be trusted because what matters to her as far her previous actions are concerned is her political survival and saving her ass from any charges of wrongdoing. The ball is in her court to prove otherwise.
After Hello Garci, most people I guess wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt because the upper and middle classes were parties to her cheating, by passive consent. But she has squandered it and has instead used the power of her office to loot and steal, afterwards. She has used the reservoir of trust and goodwill.
A surgical removal of GMA certainly would not do, that’s why people power this time must not be confined to another semblance of intra-elite power struggle. GMA is not only part of the cancer. She has hastened it and metastize it to its most malignant form.
here’s one truth you can’t handle – NAKAUPO PA RIN SI GLORIA!
kaya okay lang – laugh all you want, name-call all you want, continue what-you-want
kasi nakaupo pa rin si gloria ( anthony scalla)
Anthony ilang taon ka na? Your commenT is very CHILDISH. Sorry po. Talaga lang po. Next time sana yun something will make us think.
istambay_sakalye,
as of the posting of this comment – nakaupo pa rin si gloria. looks like she will step down at 11:59 am of June 30, 2010
for your sake, balikan mo ako kapag napatalsik na si gloria before 2010, okay?
pero since i cannot stop you from exercising your constitutional right to free expression, just continue.
for the meantime, handle the truth that nakaupo pa rin si gloria
if you believe, as i do, that most people are centrists, still, you carve out the public sphere by having minimum and maximum demands. minimum demands are: be happy with her, approve everything she does. maximum demands? throw her out together with everyone else. without the two extremes determining what’s at stake, you won’t even have any ongoing efforts, as is happening now, to chart a middle course.
this is true in politics as in any other human activity that involves negotiating between competing points of views and interests.
manolo, i sicerely apologize for my behavior recently! you are the host and i am just a guess. please understand that there are times that i have to stoop to their lowly standards when the arguments are filled with lies and more lies being bannered as truth.
when unable to refute the facts they resort to more lies and spin the truth and non sense.
still i apologize and will abide by your rules and etiquette ( hope some individuals will as well).
🙁
frombelow,
“Anthony ilang taon ka na?”
i live in quezon city
“Your commenT is very CHILDISH.”
it takes one to know one
“Sorry po.”
sorry din.
“Talaga lang po.”
talaga din
“Next time sana yun something will make us think”
susmaryosep! as if what you wrote will make anyone think! don’t flatter yourself
ay oo nga pala. you have the constitutional right to free expression.
carry on my friend
as of the posting of this comment – nakaupo pa rin si gloria. looks like she will step down at 11:59 am of June 30, 2010
for your sake, balikan mo ako kapag napatalsik na si gloria before 2010, okay?–a.scalia
i’ll be in makati celebrating then, way before 2010! i’ll even send you pics! 🙂
istambay lahat naman tayo dito guilty dun. nakabanas talaga minsan, whether pro or anti or neutral or ano…
better one day red than three days blue kumbaga.
anthony scalia,
Click my handle. I have never hidden my identity from anyone. I don’t want Manolo to have monopoly of character. Job creation is just part of it. If you’re in the business sector you might try looking at LEVELING THE PLAYING FIELD by allowing market forces to freely grow then we can CREATE JOBS as you’re been saying all this time that can actually support the Filipino and not push him to find a job abroad. Examine your benefits and compensation package, take a look at the national norm in this regard? Get rid of these corrupt leaders, put in leaders that our people will feel responsible for (no gray areas like cheating) and reforms will follow.
The jobs that we create under current conditions will only benefit a few, we need something a lot better, and we can’t rely on economic reports that are easily manipulated by anyone well versed in powerpoint.
The strength of the chain is determined by its weakest link – when our weakest link are the call center agents in the national job spectrum (min 12,000Php/month) then I’ll congratulate you guys who are focusing on job creation! Right now its below mediocre, you need to work some more…
Madonna,
“This is 2008 and there are other avenues for people power.”
abangan!
ooops…” i am just your guest” what i meant to say.
A. Scalla
“Next time sana yun something will make us thinkâ€Â
susmaryosep! as if what you wrote will make anyone think! don’t flatter yourself
Layu po yata nun. Di ko po naman sinabi n yung sinulat ko will make people think.
Yung sa inyo po yung sinasabi ko. Binalik nyo po naman sa akin yung pakiusap ko.
Pero salamat po sa pagtawag nyo sa akin as friend. Pare pareho po tayong tao at Pilipino.
Kung baga sa finals, tayo tayo din magkkita.
This is rare that we get into Mr Quezon insight on such things.
hehehe….such uncompromising stand does not make you a good politician. It is commendable though in a way that you stick with your guns, but life and politics is just so complicated to not have a middle ground. Great leaders put things into perspective looking for ways to achieve harmony for the greater good.
Anthony,
Take it easy. You sound really exasperated. We are not banging into each other’s beliefs here. We are exchanging views. In fact, listening to all sides is better than being cooped in one’s own.
Ramrod,
Naka-friendster ka pala!
“pero okay lang if the kick-glora-now school can put safety nets to cushion the collateral damage.” – anthony scalia
There will be no collateral damage. If the playing field is leveled, local industry will flourish…