This was supposed to be my column for today.
Barangay Bansot’s Silent Majority
KAPITAN Calabasa was late, and so, he missed most of the fun. But he got to hear Madam’s thank you remarks.
“Thank you, Eminensh, Your Exshelenshiesh. Thank you fathersh and shishtersh. Here are your love offeringsh, let ush continue to do the Good Lordsh, I mean, my hushband’s, my childrensh, and my, work. We are the Holy Family. God put ush here.
“Thank you, congreshmen. Thank you, governorsh. Thank you, mayorsh. Thank you, kagawadsh. Here ish your fork barrel flush an attendanshe bonush, and yesh, your frojektsh are shafe.
“Thank you, columnishtsh, for your dedicashion to our truth: don’t worry, your hushband will remain in charge of our penshionsh, and you, your board sheat in our bank ish shafe. Oh, and ash for you, shorry, no more readersh shince you moved to our crony fafer but I appreshiate your effortsh anyway, but shtof throwing water in feofle’s fashes, ha? To all of you othersh, fretending to be objective, your veshted intereshts are one with mine!
“Thank you clashmatesh, I don’t regret giving you jobsh in my adminishtrashion.
“Thank you generalsh, thank you bushineshmen, we will all froshfer together. I shay to all of you… We will not be dishtracted by the folitical noishe!”
When everyone was through falling to the floor to demonstrate awe and delight, the hard-working Madam tackled other business.
“And now, we need to work on our meshaging. Shecretary Fabili?”
“Dukutin ang pang matrikula, ituloy ang aming ligaya!”
“I don’t like. Too honesht. Shecretary Calburo?”
“Sa laki ng matrikula, turo ninyo pamumulitika!”
“Good. Plashter along the shcoolsh that hate me. Shec. Madaya, you can charge it to the nutrishion frogram. Nexsht?”
“Itrabaho natin ang panggugulo!”
“No. Shec. Hormiga?”
“Trabaho hindi gulo!”
“Good (give my regardsh to Mala Bihon). Theshe will be the shlogansh of Kashabwit sha Kalokohan. Charge their adsh to the Dishinformashion Agenshy. Nexsht?”
“Patabain natin ang mga pulitiko!”
“Hay nacu. Shec. Nalito? Imfrove, pleashe?”
“Pagkain hindi politika!”
“Clever. Slogansh for Kongresho ng Mambububulong Filipino. Charge the adsh to Metro Gago. Nexsht?”
“Ikuryente ang media, lokohin natin para sa presidente!”
“Too blunt. Shec. Bungi?”
“Ibaba ang kuryente, hindi ang presidente!”
“Good. Slogansh for Fartylisht Kakuntshaba. Charge to Frovidentshal Bashtushang Fambanshang Liaishon Offishe. Nexsht. Our latesht innovashionsh in fromoting the Rule of Lawleshnesh? Shec. Shiraulo?”
“Madam, since we are fighting the Truth, we decided that even if we have to sacrifice Executive Ordure 464 and Mambobola Circular 108, we simply issue new rules accomplishing the same thing.”
“Ish Monkey Gotme drafting them?”
“Yes Madam!”
“Your Eminenshe? Queshtion?”
“Aren’t we insulting the intelligence of our flock in Barangay Bansot?”
“Wait, my shon will anshwer that.”
“You ha. Wait ha. We’re not bastos, ha. Shut up ha? I don’t care what you say, ha? You’re giving daddypoo high blood pressure, ha. Just obey-obey us! We give you na nga eh why are you so demanding pa, ha?”
“But the desert, our sea, the Israelites…”
“Ah. Desshert? Meaty Forflavor will get for you, Eminenshe. Chocolate or vanilla? Anyway. Yesh, Mr. Juramentado?”
“Santa Palanggana! Madam, there are destabilizers from… from… all your alma maters! In Putakti City! Evil, awful… what do you call them, oh, students!”
“We are shafe here in Campo Carne. Yesh, Mareng Meanie? Thank you, by the way, for shuforting me, but (he-he) get real. My darling hushband ish staying.”
“Oh. But. Madam, the young people, their requests?”
” I hereby decree, a No Hover Zshone in Futakti Shity. Becaushe if you don’t shee them, they don’t exshisht. Shimfle! Yesh, Father Imbyernash?”
“But… reform… strengthening… institutions? Help?”
“Tell them to take it uf with my shonsh. They are the youth, too. They are the pillarsh of the inshtitushionsh we’re building.”
“Mommy, only if they’re pretty, ha? I don’t like talking to the pangit-pangit, ha? Or the brainy ones, ha? They can make a date with me in my restaurant, plenty-plenty food there.”
“OK you heard him. Go away. Yesh, Mishish Faidroshash?”
“I bloody support you, eh wot!”
“Cheaf, you shound like your daughter. But I already shaid, thank you columnishtsh.”
“But Madam…”
“Yesh, Shfeaker Jar-Jar?”
“Waza boutda peepol? They issa hates youse!”
“Sho? We have the Shilent Majority shuforting ush! The besht! They don’t need to be bribed, they don’t vote, becaushe they don’t exisht! Ferfect! More for all of ush! Anymore queshtionsh? None? Dishmished!”
***
Bencard,
Most Filipinos can’t handle the truth. Even my mother still likes to think I’m a virgin and GMA still thinks she’s making her daddy proud.
nothing nasty ’bout pointing the obvious!
calling white white and black black is being nasty?
been looking in manolo’s blog way back but never posted then.
it’s is not a big surprise that you get what you deserve!
you get what you give. thanks for the backgrounder in the movie. never seen it. not a tom cruise fan.
the facts speak for itself and let us argue it’s merits and be a man!
be(co)ard, need another prince to save your hide?
i challenge you to refute the facts posted here one by one. oh i forgot you get paid for your (useless) opinions in your profession, being a lawyer! you can’t handle the truth!!!
don’t resort to lies and spinning the truth!
MLQ:
I’ve been reading your blogs and the comments for quite some time but this the first time will make a comment. That was so funny!!! I could imagine the Evil one talking with her taray demeanor and with her teeth sticking ou
istambay, too bad you have to hound Bencard like this. This used to be manuelbuencamino’s job. But it’s a free world.
mike, i think if she’s worried at all, there’s no need to leave malacanang. they already tried storming its gates in 2002 (and during cory’s time) but they didn’t succeed. of course, i would think crame is more defensible if the situation requires it. but to say she’s “desperate” is a stretch.
Poor Erap, although he was asolutely correct that he was removed unconstitutionally, he lost all the moral and legal high ground when instead of drawing the line on the correct principled stand along institutional grounds, he acted like a royal in exile and placed himself under the very system he proclaimed was illegitimate.
You cannot put Humpty Dumpty back together again. You cannot have movable constitutional goal posts.
To avoid a constitutional crisis, the SC not only blinked they winked their way through the Edsa II crisis.
The military establishment got a leg up all on all the institutions of the state after Edsa II courtesy of the SC. It was handed to them on a silver platter and Big Mike and GMA made sure that platter was always filled with goodies.
The result – Veto power over government is now vested with the AFP.
All eyes now on the SC. Will they cut down the expanding impunity of the executive?
The state is so obviously broken.
mlq3:
This is so funny! I really can’t get over it! Can you please use it in your column so that more people can read it??? Its really great!
brianb, that entity you are talking to cannot hold a candle on buencamino. the entity is nothing but a good source of putrid foul air. at least buencamino is on record about having found crap “delectable”.
istambay, too bad you have to hound Bencard like this. This used to be manuelbuencamino’s job. But it’s a free world.-brian
just exposing for what a benc(ow)rd that he is! i apologize that i have to subject individuals here for the painful act. especially to you sir, manolo.
i am not saying any lies here. i am just pointing out the obvious. maybe he will realize it too. but i guess it’s beyond that point already.
all i’m saying is that argue from the facts and merits, but he insist treating people here as somebody inferior than him and he can talkdown to us all the time. but when the tough gets going he resorts to lies and name calling. so i’m giving him back what he was dissing then.
if he can’t take the heat then too bad.
i’d rather have a spirited discussion here and find solutions to our country’s problem. civilized and have sense. anyway it’s a free country and freedom of speech is guaranteed by the constitution and should not be repressed, unlike the present administration who’s trying very hard to prevent the truth from coming by issuing threats, e.o., and m.c.
my apologies again.
“at least buencamino is on record about having found crap “delectableâ€Â.”
There is courage in one-upping art… this is in reference to “Pink Flamingo”.
i am not into sugarcoating my statements. it’s in buencamino’s nature to be a diplomat. good medicines are always bitter to swallow and indeed the truth really hurts for the guilty individuals.
crap a good medicine? that’s a new one!
can’t find new arguments? hahahaha. benc(ow)ard, can’t resist my charm? i’m very flatterd with this much attention you’re extending to me! lol! love it, love it!
😉
Why don’t we admit it?
Gloria’s corrupt regime is what drives this nation crazy and always a laggard in matters of development, human rights, democracy – name it. No matter how her e(ako)nomists, legal pundits, spin doctors, envelopmental journalists, and apologists deodorize it, that regime still stinks to high heavens.
No matter how they cover up the messy affairs, they keep on coming out and emitting foul odor. “Laging bubukol (dahil may pigsa),†as we say it in Tagalog.
And even if they proclaim to the world that everything is ok, the fact remains that under Gloria, this govt is either going to the dogs or down the drain, whichever comes first.
It all boils down to the alpha of scheme of things, its beginning. A regime that starts off on the wrong foot of illegitimacy can never make it right. Hvrds rightly puts it in context, “the state is so obviously broken.â€Â
The most apt description for this country run by her is Barangay Bansot. A small thingy mimicking a biggy!
Hahah! Excellent caption for the The Excorcist…
Concluding prayer? Vade retro satana!
istambay,
Good logic always surges forth, a bad one stays where it is consigned to – oblivion, or erosion. Keep it up, man!
btw benc(ow)ard, watch your blood pressure. just a concerned advice to an (un)worthy entity, not the best time to be brought to a hospital. big shortage of nurses and physicians, they are leaving the country en mass! and why do you think is that? i bet you already know the answer. so ingatan mo ang puso mo ha.
i don’t pretend to be a lawyer and not definitely a diplomat ( am that obvious?), just a commom filipino like the majority. trying to make both ends meet everyday, walks around my neighborhood with open eyes, ears and mind. don’t need a lawyer to tell me what is going on in my country. i may not be as smart as benc(ow)ard here but i do have a common sense (which seems not to be that common).
also, i have a sense of nationality. sense of pride in being a filipino. i take this fight personal and hope everyone else does. this is a fight for our country. a fight i joined since the marcos regimen and fight when i supported and voted former sen. raul rocco.
there will be no shortcut, marcos in his 20+ years of rule, ruined filipinos in everyway possible and gloria is making it worse! it will take time to turn as around completely and weneed to start with the right first step towards the solution. removal of the arroyos and her minions and all corrupt politicians.
fight on!
we hear you hawaiian guy? but people are trying to understand. just maybe, people are still deciding the other truths?
is jun lozada the truth after cheating on his wife?
is cory the truth after hacienda luisita?
is senator lacson the truth after bubby dacer?
is jamby madrigal the truth after rent-seeking?
is erap the truth after being pardoned?
as nike says, image is everything.
mbw, hi! thanks for lynching me when i visited your blog. i should have known better. never will i again venture in that part of hell. btw, remember what i said, the unworthy exorcist becomes the exorcee!
Bencard, you called Jen a pampered bitch which she does not deserve… and you complain of lynching?
Thanks titanium!
as nike says, image is everything.–maginoo
and my question to you is,
what image do the arroyos and her minions have?
please answer that too. you own perception not based on what others, media or newspapers say. you own observation.
based on their actions and behaviors. it will be your own observations.
my own observation is that they have evaded, and badly at that. but i am not the people.
Bencard, you called Jen a pampered bitch which she does not deserve… and you complain of lynching? –mbw
told you so, benc(ow)ard can’t take the heat and he cries foul after doing same. what’s that sound? someone digging their own very deep hole! you want a rope with that? hahahaha. 😉
but i am not the people- maginoo
then you’re saying or claiming that you’re not a filipino?
just didn’t get that last line, what you meant by it.
istambay,
This was Bencard’s comment/exchange to Jen’s in my blog the exchange:
“Variants of truth? No way, says Jen”
Jen Llarena said…
Holy cow! Thanks Anna for the feature :)The moment I heard about the “variants to the truth”, I really couldn’t contain myself. At first I almost died in fits of laughter. But then I realized that if a child hears this, what would he/she think? That it’s ok to lie because it’s his version of the truth? tsk tsk…Talk about starting them out early.
February 27, 2008 3:32 AM
Bencard said…
to jen jen, unless you have direct line from God, your “truth”” is your VERSION of truth. your version may be acceptable to society if you can prove it under the “rule of law”. otherwise, it’s just a looney musing of a pampered bitch.
February 27, 2008 11:11 PM
(highlight mine)
@ istambay_sakalye
meant i probably don’t represent the feelings of many yet.
In my blog thread “Variants of truth? No way, says Jen”
Jen Llarena said…
Holy cow! Thanks Anna for the feature :)The moment I heard about the “variants to the truth”, I really couldn’t contain myself. At first I almost died in fits of laughter. But then I realized that if a child hears this, what would he/she think? That it’s ok to lie because it’s his version of the truth? tsk tsk…Talk about starting them out early.
February 27, 2008 3:32 AM
Bencard said…
to jen jen, unless you have direct line from God, your “truth”” is your VERSION of truth. your version may be acceptable to society if you can prove it under the “rule of law”. otherwise, it’s just a looney musing of a pampered bitch.
February 27, 2008 11:11 PM
(highlight mine) So what did Jen say that deserved that foul branding from you Bencard? And now you whine in Mlq3’s blog of lynching?
maginoo, great questions. apparently, the oust-gloria crowd finds these people “credible” (wonder if they understand what the word truly means). the way things are, i think they would believe the devil himself if he would say something against “gloria”.
mbw, which part did i say jen-jen is a pampered bitch. read my lips” i said “…if you can prove it under the “rule of law”. otherwise, it’s just a looney musing of a pampered bitch.” clearly, “it’s” refers to the “version of truth”, not jen-jen.
And you think you can get away with that? Thaat your foul remark wasn’t meant or directed at her? Geez, Bencard, subtlety is clearly not your forté!
But ok, Bencard, so as not to prolong this senseless argument with you (reading through the comments here, I see you still have plenty to tackle of the ‘musings’ against you that call your attention right here) I take your explanation as an apology — but I suggest you say it to Jen.
As other posters would say, “Peace!”
D-Day countdown continues… DAY 5
Just noticed. The Daily Tribune is spewing venom against civil society particularly B&W movement. Just shows how dysfunctional everything in our country can be. This just proves there is some truth on skeptism express my many that ousting GMA will not make any significant difference as the traditional movers and shakers are out there circling like vultures.
May I remind you that blasphemy is NOT a crime. That’s just one of those made-up ‘crimes’ brought by religion.</blockquote.
did anyone mention about crime? there is the word rebuke and
there is my word leksiyonan. Nothing was mentioned about bringing it to court like the what pharisees did in 33 AD.
let me play some sort of psychologist here, please feel free to jump in and correct me if i’m wrong. it is said ( in psychology 101), that an adult behavior can be traced back to his childhood years.
my theory is that this fellow, benc(ow)ard, when he was a child ( maybe still is)he would go and play with neighborhood kids. he then would proceed to act better and smarter than the rest. spreading lies and calling names. then the other kids started giving it back to him (which he rightfully deserve). benc(ow)ard then would throw a tantrum and threatens everyone, “isumbong ko kayong lahat sa nanay ko” (nanay glo that’s who)!
then he goes home pouting and crying.”pinagtulungtulungan po nila ako, nay”.” marami sila”.
meant i probably don’t represent the feelings of many yet.– maginoo
trust yourself. hindi ka nag-iisa. just reading the comments here there is a common sentiment among the majority. and if you read other blog sites you will see more of same.
When a few people bypass rule-of-law to make political statements, houses burn.
—————
Luxury homes burn in apparent eco-attack
Associated Press
WOODINVILLE, Wash. – Three seven-figure dream homes went up in flames early Monday in a Seattle suburb, apparently set by eco-terrorists who left a sign mocking the builders’ claims that the 4,000-plus-square-foot houses were environmentally friendly
The sign  a sheet marked with spray paint  bore the initials ELF, for Earth Liberation Front, a loose collection of radical environmentalists that has claimed responsibility for dozens of attacks since the 1990s.
The sheriff’s office estimated that Monday’s pre-dawn fires did $7 million in damage to the “Street of Dreams,” a row of unoccupied, furnished luxury model homes where tens of thousands of visitors last summer eyed the latest in high-end housing, interior design and landscaping. Three homes were destroyed and two suffered smoke damage.
And here Russia November 2007 survey : the question and the possible answers.
Wouldn’t you mind if Vladimir Putin were re-elected?
Answer:
a) Yes, I wouldn’t mind.
b) No, I wouldn’t mind.
The Moscow Times -dot-Com
Tuesday, February 5, 2008. Issue 3835. Page 3.
Opposition Activist Put in Mental Ward.
An opposition activist has been locked up in a psychiatric hospital in the Tver region, two colleagues and a hospital official said Monday.
Roman Nikolaichik, 27, a lawyer and member of Garry Kasparov’s Other Russia coalition, was detained in Tver on Friday, questioned about his political activities and subsequently taken to a psychiatric hospital, where he remained Monday, said Maxim Novikov, head of the coalition’s branch in Tver.
The account was confirmed by Yevgeny Svetovidov, a spokesman for a monarchist movement, ARES, of which Nikolaichik is a member.
A woman who answered the telephone at Litvinov Psychiatric Hospital No. 1 in the Tver region town of Busharevo said Nikolaichik was being held in an isolation ward.
She refused to connect him with a reporter but confirmed that he had been admitted Friday.
Nikolaichik’s detention echoes similar cases over the past year that human rights organizations have criticized as a step toward Soviet-era repression tactics. In December, human rights groups said Andrei Novikov, a reporter for a news service connected to the Chechen separatist government, had been released after nine months in a psychiatric hospital. Last summer, Larisa Arap, an Other Russia activist and journalist, spent six weeks in a psychiatric clinic.
Which law enforcement agency questioned Nikolaichik and sent him to the hospital was unclear Monday.
mwb, i’d love to apologize to jen if i said something that i have to apologize for. after all, i may not be as young as her but i still appreciate good looks when i see one. here’s to you and jen – PEACE.
what is more childish than calling someone “coward” just because he wouldn’t let himself be made uto-uto. yeah, we sure did that when we were kids. like taunting another kid: “if you don’t throw crap at pedro, i will call you coward” (lol).
In the Inquirer, Conrado de Quiros asks a relevant question:
Truth serum
By Conrado de Quiros
Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 00:08:00 03/03/2008
MANILA, Philippines – ….
. . .
The day before, the military and police were already in full force halting marchers dead in their tracks north and south of the capital. . . . Last I looked at the Constitution, the Bill of Rights said the citizens had a right to peaceably assemble. Preventing people from doing so because they might not be peaceable is prior censorship. I don’t know why the (opposition) lawyers aren’t busy right now badgering the Supreme Court to issue a ruling stopping that atrocity.
Hehe, ironically in the field of computer science there is a subset called “fuzzy logic”, wherein there isn’t a binary set of boolean values (true or false) but rather, a set of weights to evaluate various degrees of truth (30% true, 70% false). This is quite similar to when we, say, evaluate temperature as “hot” or “cold”. There’s no absolute truth there.
The PNP probably stood on legal grounds to double-check if the LaSalle-Cavite students (and other groups from outside metro-Manila) had a permit to rally in Makati.
Were there people with permits to rally in Makati who were denied permission to join the Friday evening rally?
I suspect the PNP stood on legal grounds to determine if the La Salle-Cavite group and other groups of demonstrators had the permits to join the Friday afternoon rally. Were there groups who hald the proper permits who were prevented from making it to Makati?
UP n student,
The PNP did this to the La Salle-Cavite group because this was a smaller group they can bully. Indeed they’re learning fast from the Shiraullo in the DOI.
Parang ellentordesillas.com na dito a. 😀
Pinoy nga naman talaga.
Nag fizzle out lang ang latest pathetic ‘people power’ attempt, nagka-watak-watak na.
Abangan ang susunod na kabanata…
“Evil people in government are like viruses and bacteria in Nature. They are inevitable. But because of that, the best strategy for long term health is to strengthen the body’s immune system.” – DJB
Funny how you should mention virus. If you put it that way, this how a med rep would see it:
Corruption is likened to HIV virus, the virus deceives the immune cells which in turn cannot distinguish them as foreign disabling any phagocytotic action on their part. These corrupt cells then enter the immune cells, in this case our institutions (judicial, military, executive, church, etc.) then multiply, in time, these infected cells burst and out comes new HIV virus cells. The long term gestation period allows the infected immune cells to traverse the body thereby getting tactical and strategic positioning for infecting other immune cells, the immune system, the institutions themselves will be used to aggravate and spread infection or in this case corruption through the whole system. In time, the infected cells outnumber the genuine cells, eventually overwhelming them. By this time, the body’s immune system is down, or all our instituions are broken from the inside…and the real troubles begin – secondary infection, because by then the body will die of pneumonia that starts off as a simple cold…imagine that scenario DJB…